Whoa, It's A Dude

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Fo sho I am a writer, an artist...I like making stuff up. But I'll have to admit that I'm not creative enuff to  write the Manti Te'o story. It was good last week, it got better and better as the days rolled by, and now...today, wowza. Here's that nutshell people keep talking about.

Manti Te'o starts an online relationship with this hottie.

He totally plays football at Notre Dame and is the best player.

During the season his grandma dies of cancer, but wait...so does his girlfriend. One the same day.

Later he finds out that he was a victim of this thing called "catfishing", where lame bad people purposely fake out an innocent person by making them believe that they are this particular online persona.

Then one of his teammates claims that he knew that the *girlfriend* was fake. He denies it.

The dude that did the faking calls and apologizes to Manti and he even apologizes to the girl-get this-the girl that he stole her Facebook photos to make the fake online girlfriend to trick Manti.

That girl was interviewed, like, yesterday, and she said she has never met Manti and said that one lame dude has been stalking her for, like, five years.

Today I have learned some new things. One when Manti talked on the phone to his *girlfriend* it was really the dude that created the fake online girlfriend and that stole that (innocent) girls  Facebook pictures...and (there is always an "and")...and the dude that created the fake online girlfriend for Manti, talked with him on the phone for (I assume) hours and hours, and that stole that innocent girls photo's...did it because he sincerely wanted to establish a relationship with...Manti.

Yeah, that looks authentic.

Admittedly, I'm not creative enuff to make this shit up. One more thing and Yesssssss, I could be guilty of connecting dots where no dots need to be connected (it's cooler when I do it, tho), but know this...Manti is one of them. Mormon (da da daaaaaa).

How can someone reasonable fall for such an endeavor. Well geez...how can someone believe that a human named Joseph Smith found gold tablets in Upper State NY, allegedly from God, that has some kinda crazy writing on it that only he can read, his wife wanted to see them, but he wouldn't let her-then he *replaces* her-bla bla bla...you guys know the story.

It's kinda no wonder if you think of it like that, right.

* Just now, and I literally mean RIGHT NOW, I was just told of a show actually called Catfishing. WTF.

* Article Sf Gate

* Manti Wiki

* Manti was also a Boy Scout.

* I feel like my insides are on fuckin' fire right now. Fuuuuuuuuuuucccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkk.